The neutrino that broke the world record by travelling faster than the speed of light has sensationally failed its mandatory post-race drugs test. Scientists at CERN have revealed that the Neutrino's A-sample tested positive for Nandrolone, a substance that is banned under CERN"s strict rules. The Neutrino's B-Sample will now be tested to confirm the findings. If that too comes up with a positive result, then the Neutrino's astonishing time, which was faster than the speed of light, will be stricken from the record books. The Neutrino's spokesperson refused to speculate on the cause of the failed test, except to say that its drink must have been spiked.
Scientists will be relieved if the Neutrino's time is wiped out. They have been up all night trying to re-write Einstein's famous E=MC squared equation. So far they'd come up with E=WTF?