This year’s paranormal games will avoid the nightmares of terrorist threat, expensive building projects and traffic gridlock by taking place in spectators’ dreams, according to a statement made in a strange echoey voice in my ear a minute ago. But a date for the opening ceremony has yet to be set “It’s all a matter of faith in these very special games,” said Games President Vincent Price from his holiday home in the afterlife. Some see it as odd that an event of this magnitude still has no fixed start date, but according to Price: “People will know that the games are about to take place when the birds go strangely silent, telephones and traffic lights cease to work and an odd mist descends.” It’s thought the projectile vomiting event in the exorcism category will be the most popular, with distances of 17 metres reached by the possessed. In common with its mainstream counterpart, a burning torch will be a symbol for the opening of the games, as part of a ceremony involving human sacrifice on a grand scale.
Paranormal Games will happen “ in people’s dreams” say organisers
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