Derek Strachan, a man with 5 years experience as a community diversity officer, is struggling to apply his finely-honed skills in the private sector.
'I thought the private sector was going to take up the slack after all the cuts' said Mr Strachan, who also has experience as a wheelie bin logistics assistant, and a 'Making sure everyone knows you're LGBT' Comms associate.
'Microsoft didn't want to know, even though I pointed out that their keyboards are a bit racist and Bill Gates should try being a lesbian occasionally, for balance.'
So far, Derek has only been offered menial work at Tescos. 'It's so demeaning, collecting money in exchange for goods or services. Morally it's incredibly conflicting.'
'Normally' said Derek, 'I oppose such vulgar commercialism. I have a natural ability to stop progress or profit, but the Retail Sector don't seem interested. It's really depressing. I'm thinking of taking them to tribunal.'