After coming under fire in recent years from Ofsted for the quality of its tuition and the rising cost of its tuition fees, the School of Hard Knocks has reported solid take-up for its latest courses, according to the Principal, David Hardman.
"This has been a growth year at the school following on from our last two years" said Mr Hardman, "our recent course in 'Economic and Legal Consequences of Riot and Violent Disorder' has been very popular with students across the UK with some reporting from their cells that this has been the most educational time of their lives"
"Our continuing adult education courses in 'Poverty Economics', 'Personal Bankruptcy' and 'The hidden longterm costs of credit cards' have been heavily oversubscribed this year" continued Mr Hardman "and without the continuing support of our corporate sponsors at Visa, Mastercard and Barclaycard, we would not be able to run these crucial life lessons - or even need to"
"Our international school has recently welcomed the entire Government of Greece into our courses on 'Austerity Budgeting for European Nations', 'Reducing the financial expectations of pensioners' and 'Why large scale tax evasion by the middle classes may be a bad financial choice', boasted Mr Hardman "and we've already had inquiries from the Governments of Portugal, Spain and Italy about late enrollments to these courses. The Government of Ireland is focussing on 'The longterm economic consequences of property bubbles' as taught by our Japanese Professors having already passed the 'Austerity Budgeting' course with flying colours"
"Looking forward, we continue to see growth in our Personal Financial Planning courses and by this time next year we expect to rollout our new courses for investors in "Why Carbon Credits are Junk Bonds in disguise" and "Gold and Precious Metal Bubbles - your part in cyclical historical inevitability"
"We look forward to all of you joining us for our 'Continuing Life Lessons'", concluded Mr Hardman, "and who knows? You may have enrolled with us already and not realised"