The Coalition Government's chief apologist, Danny Alexander, has been handed his toughest task yet since slithering into power with his fellow Lib Dem colleagues.
Forget the disgracefully shoddy, sickeningly power-grasping student tuition fees U-turn and all those other political hot potatoes. They are small beer compared to his latest assignment; for Mr Alexander has been asked by the PM and deputy PM to explain the disappointing British Summer weather since June.
Mr Cameron and Clegg have been very conspicuous by their absence since skies clouded over at the end of May. And it's no secret that British seaside landladies were known to be almost in open revolt at the coalition's handling of the summer holiday weather, and that they were looking for blood. So true to form once the shit had hit the fan and Mr Cameron may have looked bad it was "Send for Danny Alexander! He can soak it up."
At a press conference held in the Tower Ballroom in Blackpool, a shame-faced Alexander looked uncomfortable with his brief. He started off by blaming the tail-end of transatlantic hurricane activity, but was quickly shouted down by the ferocious matriarchal guesthouse and small hotel keepers. When he then moved to centre stage to present a PowerPoint presentation the rotten tomatoes started raining down on him. In no time at all his fawn-coloured suit was transformed to a bright-red sopping mess and he was forced to flee the podium.
One landlady, Mrs Penny Williams, proprietor of The Sea Breeze Guesthouse, in Bridlington said, "What the hell was he doing up there trying to make pathetic excuses? Couldn't they have got someone more likeable? He's even more irritating than bloody William Haig! He strikes me as being the kind of kid who at school was always having Kick me hard up the arse signs pinned to the back of his blazer by the other boys."
Westminster watchers are now waiting to see if this humiliating setback will signal an end to Mr Alexander's high-flying political career. A career that many argue is quite amazing inasmuch as it's ever happened in the first place.
