A leading media think tank has dubbed F1 "dull as dishwater", much to the annoyance of its pint-sized supremo, Bernie Ecclestone.
The popular media money-spinner was studied in-depth over the last two seasons and the findings of the group, a bunch of long-haired and workshy weirdos, are a damning indictment of sport.
The report accuses F1 of being terminally boring and slams the extortionate fees charged to secure broadcast rights. It goes on to say, "Essentially for broadcasters to have to pay millions of pounds for broadcast rights is a joke. It is our recommendation that they spend a tenner and simply film a Scalextric set-up. It would be just about as exciting and undoubtedly more incident filled.
Eddie Jordan, pundit and BBC track-side reporter, declined to comment but was seen in the commentary box watching the Belgian Grand Prix and dunking a seemingly endless supply of Ginger Nuts, doubtless at the expense of licence fee payers.
However media advisers and financial strategists, Boyd & Turner, believe that the report will cut no ice within the sport in the long term. Their spokesman said, "This report is nothing short of sour grapes really, and any broadcasters wishing to secure reduced rights as a result will need to think again. We can confidently predict that Mr Ecclestone will still have them jumping through hoops as usual if they wish to win 2013's lucrative contract."