Interviewed after Thursday night's Europa League tie with Hearts Harry is quoted as saying" yeah, we thought it would be a bit of fun, some fans got a chance to prove themselves, and the mascots had to come off at half time as it was past their bed time. Hearts were so shit they still couldn't beat us" he added, " No easy games in Europe?, Bollocks, any match against the Jocks is a piece of piss"
The team was selected in a number of unusual ways, which UEFA have confirmed they will be reviewing. Spurs held a Gareth Bale look-alike raffle with the two winners playing a half each. Meanwhile casual fan Danny Smith won the Lucky Pie prize, getting to play up front "I went to get a balti pie at half time, and when I ordered it a little piece of music played, then Harry turned up and told me to get my boots on because I was coming on. The lads in the pub’ll never believe it!"
However Paolo Sergio, new Hearts manager, said "Yeah we knew what was going on, they think they're so funny. But the joke's on them, they haven't realised yet that we sent a team made up of our players' grandparents - our centre forward was a 93 year old woman. Plus we had a scarecrow in goal. And we still got a draw." He went on to say “lets be realistic, who the hell wants to play in Kazakstan on a Thursday night in December? Stuff that, we never wanted to be in this competition anyway.
UEFA confirmed that Spurs will play Sporting Astana in the league stage of the competition later this autumn. Harry’s response? “Oh Bugger”