Residents of the Isle of Wight's leading geriatric-oriented community were in shock after the local Passive-Aggressive Society announced it was to disband.
"Well it certainly wasn't my fault", said Mrs Dolores Muggins, "though I'm sure there are others who disagree, they're unlikely to be right because they look so guilty".
The PASS had been for many elderly residents the key reason why they shuffled down to the sea-front on a Friday evening. "It was a pleasant place for many older women whose progressively hard-of-hearing husbands were the cause of a loss of self-esteem", said Mrs Muggins, "and to keep the juices flowing we would alternate meetings between two hostelries, 'The Huff' and 'The Folded Arms', an arrangement which kept the society members with plenty of opportunity to make ever more bizarre excuses and to cast aspersions about the other pub and indeed the society members who went to the wrong pub by mistake"
TO BE CONTINUED - MUST SLEEP - FLYING TOMORROW