In light of the increasing threat that sea gulls are currently posing for tourists in coastal towns around Britain by attacking them for food the Royal Society for Ornithology have agreed to rename the sea gull the sea bastard in regonition of what the birds are now being called by most of the irate holiday makers that have been attacked by them.
Complaints have doubled within the last year of seagulls blatantly theiving trash seaside food from unsuspecting visitors to resorts around the country leaving many tourists extremely upset over the experience.
One example of which was Trevor and Mildred Ironside of Doncaster who described their gull attack ordeal that occured in Cornwall earlier this year.
'I was just tucking into my all day breakfast outside the St.Ives Jolly Fryer sea front cafe when I noticed this gull land just above me on the roof ' explained Mr Ironside 'I was keeping my eye on him because I could see he was eyeing up my meal but while I was distracted looking at him his bastard mate swooped in from behind me and took the bloody lot off my plate. To make matters worse while I was trying to grab hold of it as he was flying off with my meal the other one I was keeping my eye on the first place flew in and took off with Mildred's breakfast. They were a right pair of cunning bastards!!!' finished Mr Ironside.
The idea of changing the name of one Britains most famous sea birds was thought to have been met with opposition from the heriachy of the bird world but when the name change idea was put forward to the Royal Society of Ornithologists it was surprisingly met with very little.
'I had no problem in green lighting this one' commented Cheif Ornithologist at the Society Dr Ray Hanchard 'I fell victim to one of these birds myself in Gt Yarmouth last year. While I was taking in the sea view walking along the promenade one of those bastard birds swooped in and flew off with my tupee. It may well of mistook it for a dark haired vermin treat but that did not alter the fact it was carrying off two and half thousand pounds worth of hair piece made out of expensive sable fur' he added.
Hanchard has already got in place several alternative names for other breeds of sea birds should they take to being the aggressive scavengers that their sea gull cousins have become.
'If any other sea birds take to menacing the public as much as the gulls are currently doing then I have names such as Shittywakes, Cormacunts and sea terds awaiting them should they do it' finished Dr Hanchard.