In a dramatic move yesterday, the governors of elite Eton College announced a new Polar Scholarship programme.
Under the proposed scheme, Polar Bear youngsters, or "cubs", who exhibit the right qualities of grit and determination will receive an Eton education at vastly discounted rates.
The move is seen as conciliatory with tension between the Posh Chaps Outward Bound Explorers group and the Polar Bear community in the Arctic Region erupting into violence last week.
Provost of Eton Roary Farquhar remarked:"We have a proud tradition of admitting boys from, ahem, the lower orders provided they're brainy and not bolshy in any way. I see no reason why one or two cubs can't benefit from their time here. And the rugger team will benefit too. Imagine the faces of the Harrovians when they see our hairy monsters! Oh my sides!"