In a astonishing about face, Ex US President George W Bush has admitted that he invaded Iraq “By mistake”. Speaking on Fox News, Bush owned up that he had meant to invade Iran but confused it with Iraq.
“I was under a lot of pressure at the time, 9’11 had just happened, and we were going after Bin Ladin in Afghanistan” he explained. “Someone in the Oval office said that Iran was developing Nuclear weapons and missiles, and the two countries are next to each other on the map. I’m not sure if I pointed to the wrong country or if the secretary doing the minutes made a typo, it’s only one letter different. Next thing I knew we had thousands of troops massing on the border of Iraq and, well, I didn’t like to say anything.“
Tony Blair, the ex British Prime Minister who backed Bush at the time is said to be taken aback by the frank confession. “He had a pretty convincing argument at the time” said Blair. “He said that God told him to do it. I mean, with the benefit of hindsight I guess that’s the same rationale as was behind the Jones Town Massacre, but when someone tells you that a deity ordered them to do something then you don’t pause to check the spelling. If I had my time over again then I would have made sure that he at least knew the difference between Saudi and Italy on a world map.”
Bush admitted that things “Kind’a snowballed” on him and that he may have lost track of spending, running up a multi trillion dollar national debt on the back of a war that has come close to bankrupting the USA. “It’s like when you get into a late night ebay shopping frenzy, a few hundred cruise missiles here, an infantry division there. Next thing you know the credit card bill arrives and it’s like ‘oops!’”
In a Philosophical mood, Bush pointed out “Shit happens.”