No more I met so-and-so on the street 30 years ago. I want the dirt.
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What's your least impressive early sexual experience?
(24 posts) (15 voices)
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Love it Rikkor, if I could give it stars I would.
I'll kick things off:
A recent trip to New York took a turn for the worse, one thing led to another and I ended up having a brief stay in Rikers Island. I won't go into details of why, let's just say I made some bad decisions. Anyway, while I was there I saw former head of the IMF Dominique Strauss Kahn get bummed in the showers.
Not strictly a sexual experience for me, but thought I'd mention it as it kind of falls into the celebrity encounter category too.
Posted 1 year ago # -
iRonA
offlineMemberOddly enough my least impressive sexual encounter was with so-and-so who I met in the street 30 years ago. It was in fact very dirty but that was in part caused by the state of the street which hadn't been cleaned for some time. I think there may have been a bin men's strike or something, or perhaps it is always like that in Huddersfield. Anyway sir, I don't know you but I am told that you need a sense of humour to survive on this site, so what are you doing here if I may ask?
Posted 1 year ago # -
Mr Payne
offlineMemberPerhaps I may be so honest as to point out that in my early youth I was given the opportunity of my dreams, handed to me on a plate, signposted in glorious technicolour, written out in triplicate etc etc to go and experience things that would probably have changed my entire view of the world forever with a little strumpet on a French campsite. I bottled it through inexperience and raw, brutal fear. Excuse me, I need to be alone..... Oh. I am.
Posted 1 year ago # -
Ironduke
offlineMemberI was once in a student bar with a group and asked if I wanted to pop outside to talk by a drop dead gorgeous brunette, far out of my league. I replied, a little puzzled, that we could talk perfectly well with everyone here in the group.
She subsequently shagged my rather shorter housemate on our stairs.
How I wish I could pop back and have a little word of advice with myself...
Posted 1 year ago # -
Quaz
offlineMemberI was in the writers' room where firm breasted lesbian sugartits69 was offering hot bi-lesbosexial sex to middle aged men, but she wasn't willing to buy in quality biscuits so I blew her out. I have perfectly good biscuits at home, where I can watch 'Cash in the atic' on the sofa.
Posted 1 year ago # -
FraserWords
offlineMemberMy friend Captain Kay (no, really, he is my friend, 80 now) offers this:
I recall we were going through the “show me yours and I’ll show you mine” period of our short romance. I was to show mine first. She was chewing on a raw carrot (a war time treat) as she gazed at my private region with a look of bored indifference on her face.
Then came the moment which would affect my sex life for ever. As I gingerly levered out the nub of the matter with forefinger and thumb, Irene spat out a mouthful of carrot, pointed and exclaimed laughingly “What do you call that dinky thing?”, then ran off leaving only a trail of chewed carrot and my young life in tatters.
The psychological effect of that experience was that as I grew taller and older my equipment remained that of a ten year old.
Well, here comes my nurse holding a warm sponge and chewing what looks like a carrot. One can but dream.Posted 1 year ago #
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