Legendary Canadian godfather of gloom Leonard Cohen has been cured of a lifetime’s addiction to miserable songs – thanks to the lovely Duchess of Cambridge.
Cohen met the glowing, lovely Duchess and that bald bloke she tows around with her on their tour of Canada and declared: “Hallelujah! I’m saved!”
The famously downbeat Canadian told journalists: “It’s nothing but Lady Gaga and Beyonce hits for me from now on,” before putting on a pair of comedy breasts and launching into a chorus of “I am h-a-p-p-y”.
Thousands of Canadians have had spontaneous orgasms during the Duchess’s tour of their rather boring country, and she has won legions of new fans thanks to her lovely loveliness and ability to wear dresses.
Cohen announced the experience of meeting the beautiful Duchess and her lovely frocks had inspired him to compose a new song, which he’s called “So Long Lovely Lovely Duchess.”
But the singer was forced to deny rumours that he had re-written the lyrics of one of his most famous songs in honour of the slender English rose. He said: “I always preferred the title Bird Like a Wire.”
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Leonard Cohen cured of misery by lovely Duchess on Canadian tour
(4 posts) (3 voices)
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Posted 1 year ago #
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Like it.
Posted 1 year ago # -
Cohen's new love of the Royal frock wearer has moved him to perform on the roof top of Buckingham Palace for next years sixtieth jubilee of the bald blokes granny.
The whole concert will be launched by Leonard singing 'keep death on the door step old love' whilst Bryan May will be parachuted in for the guitar solo that never was on the original.Posted 1 year ago # -
Thanks - gutted that nobody else liked it, but then it's probably just as well because I'm a huge fan of the godlike Cohen and felt bad using lazy cliche to take the piss. Not bad enough not to do it, obviously.
Posted 1 year ago #
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