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What's your least impressive celebrity encouter stories?


(1260 posts) (165 voices)
  • Started 6 years ago by bonjonelson
  • Latest reply from farmer giles

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  1. riesler

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    I sometimes cycle past Jules Holland's castle and I once overtook Jimmy Saville in the London Marathon - he later went past me and finished about half an hour ahead,

    Such is my life as a sporting superstar!

    Posted 6 years ago #
  2. Phlegm

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    I was cut up on the M4 by Dennis Nilsen.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  3. Quaz

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    Fred West did my cellar conversion (although I did have some very competative quotes from a chap in Austria).

    Posted 6 years ago #
  4. Mrblacker

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    I genuinely sold some plastic sheeting to John Wells. Unfortunately, not the John Wells behind the West Wing, but the british satirist.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  5. Scroat

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    Lloyd George knew my father

    Posted 6 years ago #
  6. simonjmr

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    My Nan's niece is the gran of an Arctic Monkey! I know it's very tenuous.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  7. JohnA

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    Lloyd George knew Scroat's grandmother intimately

    Posted 6 years ago #
  8. bonjonelson

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    I'm friends with someone who's mum is Kylie and Danniii Minogue's cousin.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  9. fun and games

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    I play real tennis and would have played Prince Edward, who also played at my club, if he wasn't so shit at the game. My doubles partner is married to Marlene from Only Fools, who actually has Radio 4 elocution. Bet you feel pretty small now, Jeni B.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  10. The All New Jeni B

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    I always do FaG, I always do.

    Oh, and my pal Elaine's step-mum is Shirl from Eastenders.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  11. ゴルゴ13

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    OK. Heathrow, Terminal 5, I was queueing behind this woman at EAT to get a sandwich or something. I look to my left, and there is former Chelsea and England left back and erstwhile Match of the Day 2 pundit Graeme Le Saux. The woman in front of me leaves the counter with her purchase, and heads for a chair, dropping the poncey brown cardboard sleeve from her "wrap" style sandwich. Graeme Le Saux must have thought it was her wallet, though, because he reached down, picked it up and made to give it to her, only then realising it was packaging material. She stared at him as if he were an imbecile, as he mumbled, "Erm, I thought it was your purse or something."

    He looked around to see if anyone had seen him make a tit of himself, and locked eyes with me. I just nodded. I was going to say "nice one Matt", but didn't, luckily. I get Graeme Le Saux and Matt Le Tissier mixed up sometimes because they have the same middle name, and it would've just made everything more awkward.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  12. fun and games

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    I dont mean your diminutive stature as well you know. As soon as I saw the title of this thread I expected it to have your finger prints over it, rather like those Neighbours stars' underwear in the late '80s.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  13. shitsu_tonka

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    My dad did a funeral - it's okay he's a C of E vicar it's allowed - and among the mourners were Roger Taylor off of Queen, Uncle Monty off of Withnail and I and Ruud Van Nistelrooy off of football.

    I always thought that that was a very diverse group of people to be friends with.

    Dad was also, the poor bastard, supposed to marry some imbecile from one of the more recent Big Brother series who in the run up to the big event seemed to be under the impression she was the most important person ever to get hitched such were her constant and tiresome demands. Luckily for him he retired shortly before she was due to stalk down the aisle.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  14. Quaz

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    Much as I would love to meet Richard Griffiths, I could never be trusted at a funeral with him. The temptation to put my hand on his shoulder and say "As a youth I used to weep in butcher's shops" or "I mean to have you even if it must be burglary" would be far too great.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  15. jp1885

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    Or shout "Monty you terrible c*nt!"

    I met Jim Bowen at the Three Counties Show when I was a kid.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  16. Al OPecia

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    When I was little I met the man with his hand up Basil Brush's arse.

    And Bernard off of "Yes Minister".

    At the same time, and he wasn't off of "Yes Minister" then. But in the future.

    And "Heartbeat".

    Posted 6 years ago #
  17. bonjonelson

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    Jimmy Hill called one of my ex colleagues a "lazy cow" for travelling a single floor by lift in the BBC.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  18. Oxbridge

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    I knew this rather effete chap chap quite well at Oxford, where he was a leading light in the Union but a bit of a lightweight. About a year after he both went down (oh stop sniggering), I bumped into him at Newcastle station as I came back home from a hard day's research at the county library. He congratulated me on hearing of my appointment as Senior Researcher in History at the University of Durham, saying he was struggling to get going in journalism.

    His name was Gove. Michael Gove. I've often wondered what became of him.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  19. ゴルゴ13

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    Nice anecdote, Oxbridge. Could do with a bit of editing, in my humble opinion...I'd be happy to have a go if that's OK with you.

    OK, here's another one.

    When Princess Anne came to our school to open the new library, I was one of the 6th form boys chosen to populate the study desks therein, to give it the proper scholarly ambience. My desk was on "the route", and I was told to stand up when the Princess Royal entered the room.

    She stopped at my desk and asked if the new library was an improvement on the old one. I replied that it was.

    Three years later, she was divorced from "Captain" Mark Phillips.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  20. Sinnick

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    I once saw Graeme Souness at a restaurant in Knutsford, sitting facing the door, with a couple of pretty young ladies (presumably his nieces) at his side. At least, my lawyers tell me it was someone who looked very much like him.

    I met Patrick Moore some 45 years ago; he was just the same then.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  21. Gary Stanton

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    Had my tiny plastic peddle car rammed by the front wheel of Paul Usher's (aka Barry 'Bazza' Grant ) bicycle. He lived in the same street back then i.e. when I was three .

    Met & chatted to Mark E Smith in pub in Manchester and was offered one of his famous Benson & Hedges.

    Shook Michael Stipe's hand in bar in Portsmouth after a gig some twenty years ago. I still have the hand.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  22. Mr Payne

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    I shared a cup of tea with Richard Griffiths while I was filming on 'A Kind of Living' in the 80's. Of course, back then I hadn't seen the film or played the drinking game to Withnail, so the enormity of the moment passed me by completely.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  23. beau-jolly

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    I had that ageing classical guitarist in the shop the other day. I recognised him as his nails were too long to use the card machine. Can't remember his name but I can sell you his PIN number.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  24. be reasonable

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    When I was at junior school, my best mate was the nephew of Rod Hull (the one with the emu) and my gran was the cousin of Beryl Reid's mum.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  25. rikkor

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    Real tennis? Is the required uniform still pantaloons, a feathered hat and lace at the wrists and throat?

    Posted 6 years ago #
  26. beau-jolly

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    I spent the rainy afternoon of the '77 jubilee in a friend's pub in Sevenoaks drinking with Peter Glaze off of Crackerjack. He'd been hired to entertain the kids and was a real trouper even with a skin full of Wadsworth's 6X

    Posted 6 years ago #
  27. Scroat

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    CRACKERJACK!

    Posted 6 years ago #
  28. Al OPecia

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    I met Johann Hari once and gave him some great quotes, but I don't think he remembered me.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  29. Quaz

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    For F~cks sake, will this never end?

    Just remembered, my niece and sister were in the same baby swim class as Jo Whiley, and they all went out for coffee and cakes afterwards, the day after Jo's final 'Live Lounge'.

    Alexi Sayle shopped at the garden centre I worked in back in the 80s and I saw him there.

    My mate climbed on the roof of an obscure comunity centre in order look through the skylights to see Bob Marley play.

    I was best man to someone who's dad was good friends with the minders to Keith Moon and (if I remember right) Pink Floyd. In fact, my father in law was racing against Nick Mason last month or so.

    It's just 6 degrees of separation. We all probably know Haile Selassie by association if we think hard enough or do a bit of research. Go on, try it. 6 Degress of Haile Selassie.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  30. Quaz

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    Easy. My Grandad, his uncle once served afternoon tea or dinner (whatever) to the Queen Mum, she met Haile Sallasie. And that's just 3 links. Ja rules!

    Posted 6 years ago #

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