Charity street collectors, affectionately known as Chuggers are to be given professional dancing instruction following a barrage of complaints from disgruntled shoppers.
Professional choreographers and hosts of the BBC’s So You Think You Can Dance, Nigel Lythgoe and Arlene Phillips have been approached by major charities to knock their Chuggers into shape.
The traditional ‘hippity-hop, head to one side and smile routine followed by the little wave’ is to be replaced by a more forthright Pasadoble move - more typical of a bullfighter’s entrance into the ring.
“This will definitely get people’s attention” said Arlene Phillips, “The hippity hop routine is so passé right now. I want to see life! I want to see energy! I want to see passion! This is what the British public is looking for.”
Over the next few months, the SYTYCD team will be travelling the country in an attempt to breathe new life into Chugger’s steps.
Nigel Lythgoe said “The girls and boys will be like matadors just before the kill. They’ll move towards their prey with grace and panache before extracting bank details and personal information in a flourish.”
A spokesman for one of the charities said, “We are very excited about this programme. Recently shoppers have managed to dodge into shop doorways or sidle around lamp posts and other street furniture, but with the new routine in place there’ll be no hiding places.”
Fellow panellist Sisco Gomez, who is often mistaken for a chugger himself, will be on hand to offer more advice, “I admit I did like the Hippity-hop but we’ve got to move on innit? So head spins, break dancing and moonwalking are out, out, out, just like me.”
Louise Redknapp will be concentrating on styling “The multi-coloured jumpers, fingerless gloves and dreadlocks have definitely got to go. I’m thinking Armani mixed with a touch of Burberry, but not the baseball caps – okay for Kerry Katona but far too chavvy for us.”
Consideration will also be given to chuggers performing in couples, or in group numbers.