By Johnny Jeremy Harrelson
Dear Reader,
You maybe growing tired of reading headline after headline detailing the sexual exploits of Congressmen, Governors, Actors, or your local High School English Teacher, but I believe our cultural stewards have missed the some of the most crucial aspects of this new found sexual liberation of those who hold high places in our society.
Anthony Weiner, Jesse James, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Brittni Nicole Colleps, or Strauss Kahn have all been deemed guilty in the court of public opinion for their scandalous behavior. Certainly, the circumstances surrounding some of these examples are criminal, but not all should be viewed so harshly. In fact, I believe our culture has been too quick to judge and may in fact be missing out on an opportunity to promote a healthy sex life and renewable energy in one fell swoop.
How?
Take Arnold Schwarzenegger for example. Arnold is undoubtedly a man of many credentials who didn’t just participate in activities like bodybuilding, film, and business, but revolutionized them. A true renaissance man. I am not trying to make an apology for the man, but I believe he may also have unwittingly revolutionized sexual behavior and the environmental movement at the same time. Yes, he fathered a love child with his housekeeper and kept it a secret from his wife for years. Yes, you may ask…Is there no fidelity? Is there no loyalty, no honor, no keeping of vows? In short…no, for Arnold and Maria Shriver’s relationship these things do not exist.
However,
Arnold did bring new life into this world. He continues to take care of the mother he copulated with and the child they conceived. He has blessed a child with an environment full of money, access, and resources so the child may have a greater opportunity to build his dreams with. This child has the game set in his favor and should he have children, they too will be able to reap the benefits for Arnold’s little tryst.
What does this mean for us?
The institution of marriage, for all intents and purposes, as a social institution, and for all but the most idealistically romantic or the economically disadvantaged…is a shell game. In light of the many aforementioned examples of sexually expressive public figures, I believe that Arnold has offered a most principled way of expressing himself. Again, It should not go unnoticed that he has made himself accountable and taken responsibility for the relations he has with his child and the child’s mother. I would even go so far as to say that Arnold is a godsend to all cooped up men of excellence. I would go even further and say that more men and women might consider conceiving and having as many children as they possibly can during their lifetimes!
Why?
I contend that what may seem as a morally reprehensible act is actually one of the great virtues of being human and in fact may be construed as an axiomatic solution to the prime philosophical problem as to…why we are here? To have more children!!
At the very least, one could certainly view it as a wise use of resources. Furthermore, it is a matter of sound economics. I’ll even be as so bold as to state that this type of sexual activity may even bring the world out of economic mediocrity and bring all pluralistic political factions together!
Most of us know that sharing the wealth and the distribution of wealth is a prime rallying cry for various political factions of the left. We also know that family and family values, social conservation, and property rights may be attributed to the various ideologies of the right. But sexual liberty is the catchall solution to all of our problems!
How?
If most men and women of vision and financial wherewithal began spreading their brood in record numbers, eventually everyone would be rich and everyone would have enough resources to be happy, live the good life, and have a quality education. I think I just may have won a Nobel Peace Prize right there. I’m glad you stuck around to read it…but I digress.
What does this mean for our environment?
Sustainability, green energy, renewable resources, all of these terms are placed in our minds as ways to be frugal, to downsize, and to go without for the sake of tomorrow. The Malthusian elements of how these concepts are framed are not lost on us either. However, if we take another look at it; what could be better for the future and the future of scarce resources then the most plentiful of renewable resources?
Our eggs and our seeds.
We create the wealth, we create the development, and we are the essential sustenance and stewards of this planet. The planet needs us! Seed your way to success! Sexual liberty! The catchall solution to all of our problems! Economically speaking the entrepreneur, the laborer, the technician, and the thinkers necessary to sustain our development into the future are swimming around inside of us and are waiting for us to love each other and give them the chance to succeed. Much in the same way Arnold and his housekeeper gave that little boy of theirs a chance at success.
