The Daily Mail has published a startling editorial, in which it alleges that it has recorded footage of liberally-minded people entering UK ports and airports with illegal immigrants and asylum-seekers stashed under their hats. The paper alleges that as many as 100,000 extra immigrants remain undetected underneath liberal headware.
Editor Paul Dacre writes that it is not clear whether all the people carrying the immigrants are complicit on every occasion and that “Some people may have been infected with immigrants and be carrying them into the country none-the-wiser to the dangers posed. Yet, we cannot underestimate the liberal threat from within our own borders.”
“It is a genuine concern for right-thinking British people,” wrote Dacre. “Gone are the days when you could search a trade van or lorry and hope to find tens of dead Angolans. These people have organised and are now breaching our defences one-by-one stuck underneath a beanie hat and amazingly, sometimes dressed as a beanie hat.”
“And what of the terrorist threat?” Dacre continues,"how can we protect ourselves against Al Qaeda when you can fit at least two people in a turban?! And you can’t ask to check it because they are wearing it for religious purposes. Political correctness strikes again!”
The response in the later editions of other newspapers has been muted, with The Guardian and The Independent both labelling Dacre “a maniac”.
However, The Sun has published the details of all known immigrant-protectors, and a series of novelty paper hats marked “No Immigrants Here!”, “Asylum-seekers love hats” and “Did Jew check yours?” to be worn in a show of “right-minded defiance.”
The Sun is also calling upon the government to act strongly against the new threat by introducing immigrant sensors at all points of entry to the country and by following the Australian model of “official, open and compulsory racism.”
The government has refused to be drawn on whether it was aware of the threat, with David Cameron stating that, “We will investigate the situation and the evidence. But you’ll have to bear with us; politicians tend to get a little nervous when you ask them what they have been keeping under their hats.”