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Terminally ill being asked to write down how they want to die...

(14 posts) (5 voices)

Started 2 years ago by Ironduke
Latest reply from charlies_hat

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Ironduke

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'aged 94, drunk, in the arms of the naked Swedish netball team who had taken turns with me as their sexual plaything'

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healthnews/8548722/Terminally-ill-should-write-down-how-they-want-to-die.html

Posted 2 years ago #
bonjonelson

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strapped to a nuclear bomb detonated in Birmingham

Posted 2 years ago #
Ironduke

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Have you really thought this through? Wouldn't you rather see Birmingham obliterated before you died? Or even be in a position to charge admission to the viewing gallery?

Posted 2 years ago #
bonjonelson

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I was going to put "shot dead by the police with my hands around the lifeless throat of Jim Davidson", but was worried that might be seen as an internet threat.

Of course now I've put it I'll probably get in trouble. Not that threatening nuclear terrorism is any much less serious than threatening a mildly offensive and unfunny comedian. But you know how strange things are these days.

At least I'm not threatening to blow up Nottingham Airport.

Posted 2 years ago #
be reasonable

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Being fellated by Kate Beckinsale while firing an M-50 machine gun into a crowd of traffic wardens, tax inspectors and people-traffickers.

I guess this means that Victoria Pendleton is going to be available on the NHS. Have some stars.

Posted 2 years ago #
Ironduke

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A felatio fatality? One for those NHS accident statistics...

Posted 2 years ago #
John Wiltshire

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Did someone mention the gorgeous Victoria?! Vicky dressed in black basque, stockings and high heels, riding - but not a bike...! Blimey, I'll have to go for a lie down in a darkened room now...

Posted 2 years ago #
Ironduke

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Be Reasonable, thats clearly very well thought through.
Initially I thought that you couldn't help but be put off your aim by Kate bobbing away, but you;ve packed the verminous traffic wardens etc into a crowd to compensate for that.

This isn't a new concept for you, is it?

Posted 2 years ago #
be reasonable

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Nope, been dreaming about it for years. Although I did wonder at the appropriateness of putting people traffickers in with those other vermin.

Posted 2 years ago #
Ironduke

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I dread to think where you;ve put the politicians...

Posted 2 years ago #
be reasonable

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What do you think I'm standing on? ☺
Has Mr. Wiltshire emerged from his darkened room yet?

Posted 2 years ago #
Ironduke

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I think John has emerged a much wiser, and moderately dehydrated, man.

Posted 2 years ago #
John Wiltshire

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Yes, I have, thanks for asking. Now I don't need to think of Victoria Pendleton in stockings and - excuse me again....

Posted 2 years ago #
charlies_hat

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I would bury myself alive with a mobile phone and bottle of Evian......

Posted 2 years ago #

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