UK Defence Secretary Dr Liam Fox has been forced into an apology for the poor soundtrack to the current Afghan and Libyan conflicts. “People look back on the Vietnam war and remember the great soundtrack but forget all the bad stuff. One of the biggest problems faced by our forces today in Afghanistan and Libya is the low availability of good music.”. Dr Fox, who worked as a DJ on Capital Radio until 2005, has admitted that recent defence cutbacks have forced the military to fall back on Jedwood and other X-Factor winners while decommissioning bands like Madness (now used only for ceremonial duties) and New Order .
Ex US president George Bush has admitted that many of the problems with the war in Iraq were caused by the poor quality of music available to troops during the early 2000’s. Speaking to an audience of veterans Bush spoke candidly about his choice of soundtrack for the war.
“Back in the late 1960s when I was avoiding going to Vietnam we had some fantastic music to choose from. The best years of Motown, Jimi Hendrix, The Doors. The thing that keeps me awake at nights now is knowing that I sent men into battle in 2003 with inadequate music. Justin Timberlake, Beyonce and Christina Aguilera were simply not up to the task.”
General” Stormin’ Norman” Schwarzkopf , Commander in Chief of the US Central Command at the time of the first Gulf war in 1991 and a keen club DJ commented “During my time in Vietnam the music was first class, so during the Gulf war I made sure that we had plenty of Bruce Springstein and 1980’s Heavy Metal to draw on, tempered with some kicking House. Sadly, after the war these stockpiles were run down leaving just a minimal amount of Coldplay albums and some obscure Death Metal for the second Gulf war.”