A premiership footballer, who does not wish to be named but is in fact Mark Swindlehurst of Blackburn Rovers, has admitted to being totally embarassed at not having a superinjunction.
'All the other lads laugh at me,' he confessed. 'They're all out shagging anything that moves, and then paying fifty grand to stop anyone reporting it, while I'm at home with the wife and kids. Even the wife has a go at me. She says "What sort of a man are you when you can't even pull some 17 year old slapper at Stringfellows? We're the only family around here without a superinjunction to our name, and it's ruining my reputation with the other slags". It's true that our son gets teased at Eton for me not having a superinjunction, so I'm determined to get one so we can hold our heads up again in decent society.
'Meanwhile, I just watch Jeremy Clarkson on the telly, videos of Ryan Giggs, and a film with Ewan McGregor in it while wishing I was as rich as Lakshmi Mittal.'
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Premiership footballer embarassed he has no superinjunction.
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John Wiltshire
offlineMemberPosted 2 years ago # -
Welcome back John. I hope the recent absence wasn't due to a brief custodial sentence for breaking super injunctions, otherwise you may well be off again soon...
Posted 2 years ago #
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