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1. 

   waylandsmithy
   

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   I loved the original submission on this. But by changing the headline in the edit, and only some of the text, it now doesn't make sense. Or is it just me?

   Posted 2 years ago #
2. 

   editor
   

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   Apologies for that - the text was changed but not the headline so early risers or those reading the emailed story would have got the old headline. Hopefully it is now at least logically consistent - whether you prefer the old angle to the new one is of course entirely up to you...

   Posted 2 years ago #
3. 

   OllieP
   

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   I actually prefer the new angle, even if it is the complete opposite of the original! And am glad you cut the fluff out.

   The only aspect that may have given rise to confusion is the fact the media are said to have joined in with the application even though Labour did it by accident. Is that what you were referring to wayland?

   Posted 2 years ago #
4. 

   OllieP
   

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   How about:

   Ordinarily the press would fight such an injunction on the grounds of free speech, but it turns out they happily accepted the Labour Party's mistaken application. The editor of The Sun, Dominic Mohan, stated, ‘We decided not to fight the Labour Party in this move despite being supporters of the Conservatives who would have clearly benefited from almost any story featuring Ed Miliband. We did it because we couldn’t contemplate a future in which Labour’s nominal leader was given even a single column inch. So the best way to achieve this was to effectively gag ourselves, just in case the urge arose in some mad young hack to try to slip a story past us.’

   Or something similar.

   Posted 2 years ago #
5. 

   editor
   

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   Thanks Ollie - 'tis done!

   Posted 2 years ago #
6. 

   OllieP
   

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   Sorry Ed, but one last thing and then I'll go away. Could you change the first "fight" to "contest" in the updated paragraph to avoid repetition.

   Ta.

   Posted 2 years ago #
7. 

   QorbeQ
   

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   And Jeremy Paxman "is another supporter of the extension" needs a little diddling with too ... I think twisted new angle works better too - cracking FP!

   Posted 2 years ago #
8. 

   waylandsmithy
   

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   First part still says the injunction ends in June, but the reference to an extension suddenly appears in the second half...

   Posted 2 years ago #
9. 

   OllieP
   

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   How about ending the first paragraph with .... and is due to be lifted shortly before the next election.

   Also, in reference to the Paxman paragraph, he can just be changed to saying "was a supporter of the injunction".

   Thoughts?

   Posted 2 years ago #
10. 

    waylandsmithy
    

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    That'll fix it! I think either angle works really well, but not a combination of the two!

    Posted 2 years ago #
11. 

    editor
    

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    All sorted. Hey - this is a whole new way of co-writing NewsBiscuit stories. Waiting till they have been published and then correcting the sloppy editing! I will endeavour to concentrate more in future in future.

    Posted 2 years ago #
12. 

    OllieP
    

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    Hi Ed, I have just realised that the words "nine-month" before gagging order in the first paragraph needs to be removed now. And the Paxman bit still mentions an extension. Sorry if you have already amended this, but the changes are not showing on the front page yet. And the caption on the photo now doesn't make sense either!

    I think that is it. But it will be worth it.

    Posted 2 years ago #
13. 

    Vertically Challenged Giant
    

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    I think the picture would work better if she was waving with her right hand and therefore partially obscuring Milliband's face.

    And the background should be a slightly different shade of red.

    And the first comma in the third paragraph would work better as a semi-colon.

    While we're at it, can you amend the result of the weekend's FA cup final so that City didn't win please?

    Shall I fuck off now? Ok then.

    Posted 2 years ago #
14. 

    rikkor
    

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    Forget about it. Only three people ever visit this site.

    Posted 2 years ago #
15. 

    OllieP
    

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    It's a few more than that isn't it? And I thought it only had three contributors.

    Posted 2 years ago #
16. 

    Vertically Challenged Giant
    

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    I Actually had a look for some free statistics on hit rates etc and found that newsbiscuit is the 99th most popular website in Scunthorpe. So there.

    Unfortunately only 12 people in Scunthorpe know how to work the interweb.

    Posted 2 years ago #
17. 

    OllieP
    

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    Newly updated version looks really good. We got there in the end, and thanks for all your hard work.

    Posted 2 years ago #

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