Following a ruling by the supreme court of the European Union, manequins in department stores are to be required to be in possession of life-like genetalia.
The ruling which follow the decision of a French court to make female manequins feature hairy arm-pits has been heralded by schoolboys across the EU.
"The absence of proper nipples on the dummies in Debenhams has really annoyed me" says 16 year-old Luke Grant from Liverpool "And what's with the no-minge approach to the women's nether regions - it's just ridiculous. This ruling is a life-changer."
Whilst most hetrosexual men back the changes to the female manequins, there is less enthusiam for the Court's ruling on male manequins, which requires them to be based on the genetalia of 1980's porn star John Holmes.
"When I first saw the dummies based on John Holmes I thought the model maker had incorrectly read the specification" said Grant "Making an inch seem more like a foot, after all it's a easy mistake to make. On second thoughts perhaps the old way was best and perhaps its better to return things to how they were. And quick"