Channel 4 today announced its new reality tv series ‘Pimp My Park and Ride’. The format is a wholly British idea and centres on a team of highly skilled ‘Street’ mechanics taking a tired and under-used park and ride facility and ‘pimping’ it with the latest sound systems, paints, and other ‘pimp’ items.
Describing the programme, a Channel 4 executive told reporters, ‘This is an exciting format that has already received close attention from local councils around the country who are keen to update their existing park and ride schemes. Many councils have complained to us that their systems really only involve a desolate wasteland disguised as a car park, a rusty old coach, and a few badly positioned motorway signs. Some have admitted that their ‘Park and Ride’ scheme is really just a scam to appease the environmental lobby. Our idea, and the genius of the programme, has been to update, or ‘pimp’ these facilities.
‘In the first series, our team have achieved a number of firsts for television. The audience will see the first ever ‘Low-rider coach’ with ultra-violet lighting underneath, lowered suspension, a large rear wing for improved handling around corners, and 400 decibel speaker system involving reinforced concrete. We were given special permission to ‘pimp’ the signs on the motorway with flashing neon lights and life size models of prostitutes apparently plying their trade. In the car parks we have introduced a real feeling of edgy menace. In one such car park we managed to install a life size Vauxhall Corsa travelling on a continuous loop playing dance music at high volume. Every 12 minutes real litter from McDonald’s is thrown out of the car window. The ‘pimping’ has even been applied to the staff at the Park and Ride: the coach drivers have been given new ‘Huggy Bear’ style uniforms and the ticket inspectors in the car park are now dressed up to look like women of the night.’
‘Reaction to the modified Park and Ride Schemes has been generally positive. In most areas there has been a significant reduction in town and city centre parking. Residents and visitors alike have expressed positive views of the new ‘pimping’. Our only failure was Basildon, but that was only because there was nothing we could add to existing facilities.’