Mr. Bob Smith, of Peterborough, today admitted that the method of smattering an account with half-truths, dissembling and lies that worked so well for Alistair Campbell at the Chilcott enquiry 'doesn't really work for me'. He continued, "it started really well, with a blunt denial on my part along the lines of 'no I didn't have an affair with Ruby from finance, it was just a peck on the cheek under the mistletoe at the Christmas party, and it was Stella from the post room, anyway'". Looking rueful, he went on "it went well until Mrs Smith then started to present 'evidence' - she said 'you don't get bloody crabs from a peck on the cheek, you shit'. I replied 'those are not crabs, they're a rare species of Mongolian groin-spiders that I'm looking after for the boss while she's on holiday'.
'That's when the Le Creuset griddle knocked out three of my teeth. The problem is, I just can't make something obviously untrue sound convincing. You have to be a complete c*nt to do that'.
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Alistair Campbell 'misrepresentation' technique a failure, reports local man.
(5 posts) (4 voices)
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be reasonable
offlineMemberPosted 2 years ago # -
waylandsmithy
offlineMemberI like this a lot, but when I read the headline I thought the angle wa going to be 'the whole country knew he was lying, and its taken this long for the enquiry to work it out?'
I wonder if its possible to crowbar a 45 minute reference in?
Posted 2 years ago #
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