Hours after the death of Claud Choules the last known WW1 combat veteran was announced, the German chancellor Angela Merkel wheeled out 112 year old Otto Bitzer a former infantry man from Munich and declared Germany as the actual winners of the war under the universally recognised 'last man standing' rule.
Quizzed on why the world had not known of Otto before, Merkel revealed that he was one of ten men who were moved into a secure hospital in 1982 when the idea of attempting to outlast the allies was first floated. Despite receiving the best medical attention a flu epidemic in 1995 did for four of the veterans and two more died from stroke and heart failure the following year. An argument amongst the remaining veterans in 1999 over whether the Millenium bug posed a health threat unfortunately turned violent and lead to a further death and the imprisonment of two others leaving just Otto holding on.
Merkel has demanded that the treaty of Versailles be renegotiated and that reparation payments made to the allies between 1918 and 1939 be returned with back dated interest. David Cameron disputed the victory on the grounds that Bitzer wasn't actually standing, nor indeed conscious as he has been plugged into a life support machine since slipping into a coma in 2008.