Literary critics have revealed that novelist Will Self invented his own words to hoodwink readers into thinking they were reading something profound.
'Readers of Mr Self's books had such frequent recourse to a dictionary that eventually they stopped looking up words and took him on trust. Mr Self took advantage and inserted words of his own invention,' said Cambridge University's Dr R F Levies.
But Mr Self has angrily denied the charge.
'It's complete rubbollishcrape,' the novelist declared.