The RAF is, this morning, considering strike action against the army following the latter's dawn raid on the royal costume department. In a daring move in the early hours of this morning, the army substituted Prince William's RAF uniform for a gaudy bright scarlet affair leaving the peoples prince no choice but to look like a tin soldier on his wedding day. The prince is quoted as saying "I shall look and feel like a prat". He is said to be as upset by the last-minute, and completely unannounced, switch as his RAF colleagues and, indeed, the rest of the nation. He is said to ave been close to tears by the last-minute surprise but not beaten yet.
In a cunning retaliatory move, he has ordered the RAF to paint all its planes bright scarlet to match.
Hip! Hip! Hurray!