Businessman Sir Richard Branson alarmed conservationists today by announcing that he will be re-locating himself to Moskito Island one of the British Virgin Islands in the Caribbean.
Even though Branson owns the Island the project to move himself there has alarmed conservation scientists, who point out that the introduction of Branson may prove disastrous to native wildlife.
'He maybe moving into a purpose built luxury house but will it have a purpose built fence surrounding it so that he will not be able to get out of it to upset existing native wildlife,fauna and flora' explained concerned scientist Dr Max Fairhead 'one look of Branson's teeth could do untold damage to local plant life by exposing it to higher levels of light than it normally receives. Photosythnesis from the sun is all they need but the extra impact from the light off Bransons teeth could cause them to wilt just from one cheesy smile from his grinning face' continued the worried scientist.
Branson hobbies have also caused concerns in upsetting the Islands fragile eco system especially with his ballooning and powerboating activties.
'It wouldn't be so bad if he managed to keep his balloons in the air or his boats on the water but it's all very worrying considering his record of crashing them ' said Fairhead 'you imagine you were an endangered rainbow tree finch settling down on your nest for the night on top of your young only for Branson to come bursting through the branches in his out of control balloon knocking you and your nearest and dearest out of the tree and to your collective deaths. Or a pair of sea turtles going about their mating process only for Branson to play the aquatic gooseberry by over turning his speed boat on top of you interupting your proceedings'.
Dr Fairhead suggested that Branson's presence on the Island could contravene many regulations relating to translocating certain species around the world and would want to avoid the repetition of disastrous events such as the introduction of rabbits and cane toads to Australia.
'In the instance of the rabbit we had to introduce the fox to Australia to try and reduce the numbers but the foxes became a bigger pest than the rabbits' explained Fairhead 'in Bransons case we may have to introduce the Alan Sugar to Moskito Island in a similar vain to the foxes to try and reduce Bransons impact'.
This idea is thought flawed as it may create a similar problem in having two multi millionaires battling for supremacy on one small island could cause even more devastation ' how long will it be before Sugar flys over twelve wannebee apprentices to the Island challenging them to do something clever with a coconut in order to make some money out of it. I also worry about all those smug egos being in one place because the glow from them alone could cause a forest fire ' finished Fairhead