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I'm feeling rather left out and quite peeved that no-one's had a pop at me yet

(20 posts) (11 voices)

Started 10 years ago by jp1885
Latest reply from Scroat

jp1885

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Therefore, you're all a bunch of bastards!

Posted 10 years ago #
Zadok the second

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*pop*

There you go.

Posted 10 years ago #
Mary Evans

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Don't worry JP. We're all saying it behind your back.

Posted 10 years ago #
QorbeQ

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I'll say it to his face, or if his face isn't available I'll at least leave him a hastily-scribbled note before he gets back and sees who it's from...

Posted 10 years ago #
Scroat

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Excuse me if I don't sidle up to my accuser, roll on my back, whimper, and wave my arms and legs in the air while waiting to have my tummy tickled and maybe, if I'm lucky, get a pat on the head...

But I was gardening at the weekend and can't move today.

However...

*POP* if that helps.

Posted 10 years ago #
rickwestwell

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I see Rikkor's been at the tags again... :-)

Posted 10 years ago #
Scroat

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Or the tabs

Posted 10 years ago #
jp1885

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Damn those tags - why do they have to be so piercingly accurate?

Posted 10 years ago #
Des Custard

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I need a bit more to go on, stereotype-wise, before I can take a proper pop. Please fill in the questionnaire and I'll get back to you asap.

Posted 10 years ago #
fun and games

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Lardy Attention Seeking Twat. I actually refer to a kid I teach as an AST (most of the aforementioned), but he doesn't look to be as keen on doughnuts as you. Will that do?

Posted 10 years ago #
jp1885

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That'll do nicely - though I'm more of a savory (pizza and kebab) than sweet (doughnuts) man.

Posted 10 years ago #
Mary Evans

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I think you're an incredibly sweet man, JP.
Ya wanker.

Posted 10 years ago #
sauce

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JP, how could you forget what Oxy and I did to you in Ledbury?

Posted 10 years ago #
Scroat

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Sure I had my shopping list here somewhere

Posted 10 years ago #
The All New Jeni B

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Oh for fuck sake! Haven't you taken the hint yet jp?
The reason no-one had taken a pop at you was because we were all hoping you'd just fuck off.

Now fuck off.

(x)

Posted 10 years ago #
jp1885

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Ah, that's more like it - 'fuck off', 'wanker', 'shopping list' - thanks all, I feel included now :-)

JP, how could you forget what Oxy and I did to you in Ledbury?

With the help of expensive therapy and strong medication Sauce.

Posted 10 years ago #
edward hack

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west midlands sex god **?+*&"*?#**????????
is that in Tipton or Gornall

Posted 10 years ago #
Zadok the second

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Surely 'west midlands sex god' is an oxymoron?

Posted 10 years ago #
Des Custard

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Dear Mr 1885

Thank you for your completed questionnaire and direct debit mandate. This month's personalised pop is: 'Toss off, you pisser'.

Posted 10 years ago #
Scroat

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Watch this space! Next month we're offering "Fuck off you wanker" with a free "Bugger off you <insert regional description here> pillock.

Also watch out for more Buy One Get Stuffed Free offers in June!!

Posted 10 years ago #

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