The Elephant in the Room has made a strategic decision to head for the buffet table and start scooping up peanuts.
Insiders say he's become withdrawn and self conscious, as people seem to regard him with a mixture of fear, loathing and grudging tolerance. "It's the passive aggressiveness I can't stand," he Tweeted. "I wish somebody would tell me what I've done wrong."
Scooping up peanuts could be a strategic mistake that could see the poor pachyderm become even less popular, however. Reports are emerging that with peanuts likely to be the most in demand party snack - based on past performance - any Elephant who monopolises the supply of the legume is likely to be a source of resentment.
'If he'd gone for the egg sandwiches nobody would have minded but peanuts, along with twiglets, are an essential for most people in these situation,' said an expert, 'they're quick and convenient and give you something to do with your hands. Or trunk.'
The more-ishness of the salty snack could see the elephant falling into a fatal trap - finishing off the entire bowl. 'This is the modus operandum by which many party goes have been lured to their social death,' said a detective.
[BOLLOCKS. I'D BETTER GET BACK TO MY REPORT ABOUT THE FSA'S DIKTAT ON MOBILE PHONE CALL RECORDING]