William Hague has today vowed to continue with their current policy of using unconventional methods of communication following the weekend's bungled attempt to make contact with the Libyan rebels.
'With the possibility of emails ending up on Wikileaks and pressure to bring down our phone-bill we're starting to be more creative in the way we communicate' explained Mr Hague. 'We tried helicoptering a delegation into Libya to talk to the rebels last week and we've been working with the armed forces to develop a number of other methods to try in the coming weeks. We're going to parachute a load of Ghurkas into Iran later this week to deliver a St Patricks Day card to President Ahmadinajad, and we're writing a message on a missile to Kim Jong Il to send to North Korea.'
'We were also considering sending Harriers over to Palestine to do some sky-writing next week' he added, 'until we remembered that we've scrapped them.'