The Duke of Edinburgh's office announced today that his advanced age and precarious health precluded him from hatching a plan to put a stop to the international embarrassment known as the Duke of York. Prince Philip is wistfully quoted saying "the Princess Diana 'car crash' will have to stand as my best and most recent secret op. It's time for me to pass the lead-weighted baton on to a new generation of royal enforcers." In other Court news, the Princess Royal has departed for Pyongyang to attend a ballet recital and an intensive six-week course in counter insurgency tactics.
Quick links: NewsBiscuit Home • Chat Room • Writers' Room • Top Ten
Philip "just not up to" whacking Duke of York.
(14 posts) (10 voices)
Current rating::
-
God help me rikkor, I think there's mileage in this one. Maybe it's the charlie sheen pumping through my system but I suddenly had hallucinations of the Duke of Edinburgh writing off to the Acme Co and then building fiendish traps to maim D of Y in a Wile E Coyote stylee - with York running around 'meeping'.
The onset of old age also means that making light-hearted racist remarks causes severe agony inducing for the Duke, who today was unable to even insult a group of Chinese primary school children from a Beijing deaf school who presented him with a papier-mâché corgi. Things may be so severe that it is now thought that there is little comedic milage to be had from sitting him next to the mother of the bride at the forthcoming royal wedding.
Posted 5 years ago # -
This is a great idea! I wish I had time to expand it a bit.
How about a "Philip coming out of retirement for one last job" angle?
Posted 5 years ago # -
And a further 5* from me.
You don't sub very often, but this is an absolute peach.Posted 5 years ago #
Reply
You must log in to post.