The egyptian army confirmed yesterday that it had chosen a leaving gift for former commander-in-chief Hosni Mubarak. 'We had a whip-round,' said a general, and the lads suggested we book him an OAP's diving course at 'Abdul's surf n chill shack' in Sharm-el-sheikh.
'He's gonna love it' said abdul's new assistant, Captain Mahmoud Basboussa. 'Once he gets used to wearing the raw meat diving weights, we'll maybe try him on a few simple dives - like the old minefield. And if he gets really good there's the 'plant the pink star of David flag on the Saudi coastline' challenge!'
To respect the president's privacy the course will take place on a private beach, in a specially roped-off area of the red sea. The course leaders are also understood to be preparing the latest shore-to-diver technology, enabling mr Mubarak to swim completely unmolested while they guide him from dry land.
'We hope he likes Sharm' said an army spokesman. 'we considered Dahab, but that's already full of 80-something stoners claiming they used to be president'.