For years the unsung hero of backbench politics, Timmy the talking Tie today took the commons by storm in his maiden speech, with comparisons to the unimpressive Clegg leading for calls for a straight swap.
Clegg, it has been found, fits perfectly on the vacant hanger in Tie Rack, whilst Timmy has already surpassed Clegg in terms of honesty, policy making and headline grabbing. The tie also looks slightly better hanging from Cameron's neck than Clegg does.
etc...