Reporters and tourists arriving in one of the three small African states recently have been highly confused by a crowd of individuals bearing signs reading "Welcome To Equatorial Guinea" adjacent to crowds of individuals bearing signs reading "Welcome To French Guinea" and "Welcome To Guinea-Bissau". Frequently, remarks and disagreements between the crowds soon spill over into recriminations and squabbling. Riot police have proved ineffectual in controlling the situation as they cannot determine whether or not they have jurisdiction. Several tourists have been so alarmed and disoriented that they have immediately got back on the plane and waited for their departure date to arrive, forced to eat the airline food to stay alive.
The indentity of the three states had already been eroded by President Bush's tendency to refer to them variously as Guyana, Guatemala, Guadalajara and Guantanamo. However a more recent incident has thrown things into further chaos.
The source of the confusion seems to date back to the 2009 Copenhagen summit when Guinea's Alpha Conde, Equatorial Guinea's Teodoro Obiang and Guinea-Bissau's Malam Sanha apparently decided to swap identities for a laugh in order to see whether any of the Western nations would notice. An alternative story claims that the three heads of state were confused by poorly written signs held by the chauffeurs who picked them up at the airport.
After the conference, the three leaders attempted to swap back but having thrown themselves so forcefully and totally into finally resolving climate change once and for all, they had lost focus on which state they had originally been the leader of and returned to the wrong countries. In all three cases, the country was now presented with a leader who was suddenly referring to the nation by a different name. Fearing punishment if they dared correct the head of state, various toadies and officials began imitating the name change.
However citizens of the other countries did not take kindly to another nation suddenly using their name, though international copyright law is unclear on names of nations, despite the clear ruling against North Korea's bid to become "Better Than America".
Smelling an opportunity to expand their power, the three leaders are using undercover agents in all three states, whose purpose is to convince the citizenry that all three are the same country and belong to the same leader.
Asked to address the situation, UN chief Ban Ki-Moon's response, "Well they might as well be the same country for all anyone cares", has been called 'less than helpful' by some commentators.
Observers remain fearful that the confusion may soon spread to Papa New Guinea and perhaps even Ghana and Gambia.