Biscuitologists reacted with delight today when an endangered variety of biscuit was discovered in the back of a pensioner's cupboard. The humble fig roll was widely believed to have all but disappeared when the now dominant 'chocolate tops' invaded their territory. It is thought that as the chocolate biscuits mutated into an abundance of tasty forms, the rather bland fig rolls were left unbought to the verge of extinction.
"This is great news" enthused amateur biscuitoligist, Richard Tea. "A discovery like this is akin to finding nice, shiny things in the tomb of Tutankhamun"
However Mr Tea's joy was not to last. Shortly after the discovery the fig roll was ruthlessly dispatched by some territorial chocolate HobNobs. "It is a bit sad" lamented Richard Tea boiling the kettle, "but it's the way off the world. Only the yummiest biscuits can survive."
Mr Tea plans to make a film about his once-in-a-lifetime discovery, charting the highs and lows of his encounter with the fig roll. "It will be a rollercoaster of emotions, with a gruesome kill scene , spiralling into the depths of despair" he promoted. "The working title is 'For Whom The Kettle Boils'".
Casting suggestions gratefully received.
