The Pentagon has revealed evidence that the founder of Wikileaks, Julian Assange, has a new pet which he takes with him to important meetings. Harry, a soft white persian hairy white cat has been at the heart of the Wikileaks empire for the last three months, according to Secretary of Defense Robert Gates, and if he could talk, he added, by God what tales he'd tell.
Citing evidence including pictures, audio conversations held on Voice over internet protocol systems and the occasional screenshot, all delivered under an agreement with Google Streetview, the Pentagon argued that clear evidence was available that Wikileaks was a fundamental risk to democratic institutions such as the US Federal government, provided clear evidence that the world was about to end if nothing was done, and that the cat was probably male and could do with being neutered.
News of Mr Assange's new purchase haven't dissuaded the WhiteHouse from launching legal proceedings citing espionage and top agents Bambi and Thumper are said to be making suitable preparations.
However, The US Government has upped the ante by saying they may activate one of their field agents currently in the vicinity of Mr Assange, living in a safe house in London. She is said to have strange pointy shoes which could be lethal if directed in the right way. Names weren't given, but early evidence suggests it might be Theresa May.