A tragic script mix up in Jamie Olivers latest christmas advert for Tesco's has seen the cheeky cockney chipper TV chef meet his maker in most bizzare circumstances as the turkey he was supposed to cook, stuff and present to the fictious family for their christmas meal on the advert instead cooked, stuffed and presented Oliver himself to the fictious family for their christmas meal in a fatal role reversal.
' We couldn't believe our eyes when we saw the turkey appear from the kitchen with a roasted Oliver curled up on the tray ready for carving' said one of the adverts producers 'we were so taken aback that our actor dad had sliced off half his backside before anybody could stop him. Even then it was too late because it was clear that Oliver had all is giblets removed and had been in the oven for three hours cooking at gas mark seven making him deader than Elvis before we could do anything about it'.
Producers were quick to blame a new floor apprentice for delivering the wrong scripts to the wrong dressing rooms but did admit that ' Oliver did taste better than we thought and if wasn't for the fact that turkey is the usual headliner for the christmas meal then we could offer up a few more celebrity chefs as the main course instead. I mean you could still be dining out on Anthony Worrall Thompson until easter'.
As a footnote to the story the turkey in question has just been given it's own TV show on BBC1. Nigella Lawson is said to be upset by having another bird on a rival cookery show that can suggestively gobble at the camera better than she can.