Irish Taoiseach Brian Cowen has claimed the the end of the financial crisis is in sight after it was revealed that the IMF and Eurozone loans are unenforceable.
"I was sitting in my underpants watching Jeremy Kyle when the commercial came on the telly," said a beaming Mr Cowen. "It seems that the Consumer Credit Act 1974 requires lenders to include certain information in a loan agreement. If the information is either missing or incorrect the lender cannot enforce the loan. This means that the borrower does not have to pay the outstanding balance. This can often amount to thousands of pounds. In our case billions."
In a further boost for the Irish economy it was revealed that where loans insurance has been mis-sold it does not have any effect on the clients credit rating."We will still be looking to have a general election in January," said Mr Cowen "but after the Decomber income tax refund we can now put in place, I think we are a shoe in. The Greens can go and get stuffed."
Meanwhile George Osborne was unavailable for comment following growing speculation that he failed to get a receipt for the "friend in need loan" when he handed over the cash over a pint in the McGuinness Irish theme bar in Kilburn.