An undercover investigation has revealed that 8 out of 10 supermodels on the New York catwalk this season have ditched Botox in favour of Chemotherapy. With side-effects from this treatment including considerable weight and hair loss, and offering models a 'healthy glow', it also provides the perfect excuse for post-meal bathroom visits for vomiting. To accommodate these radio-waifs, top designers have invented a new 'size minus'. They have also had to develop new hangers for the clothes as the models are now thinner than the traditional wire hanger.
With margins tight in the haute-couture world, the savings made on nail varnish and strip wax alone will save five labels this year. Although half of the money will be donated by the Chanel foundation to Africa and is expected to solve third world poverty before 2013.
Despite outcry from the larger women's rights groups, Donatella Versace has created a new swimwear collection to welcome the trend, based on super-micro bikinis too small for a Brazillian and so requiring a 'Chernobylian'. Male models will parade the catwalk in loose swim shorts known as 'chernobyl fallouts'.