Fashion magazines across Britain are this week trumpetting the 'death of the lifestyle' as Brits settle into hard economic times that show few signs of ending in the foreseeable future. "What we're seeing is that people think that lifestyles are a bit, well, insensitive," explained Rebecca Tarring of Fashion Tomorrow magazine. "Even if you can afford one yourself it feels like mocking people to actually have one."
Internet shoppers have certainly noticed that something is going on. According to analysts there has been a 1000% increase in the number of used macbooks for sale on ebay and a fourfold increase in the number of second-hand Italian scooters on used car websites. One ex-lifestylist admitted in an online forum that he had had trouble selling his otter-skin record bag: "There has been a sudden glut on the market," he said. "Six months ago you couldn't even buy these new, now I might as well use it to go shopping in Aldi - which is better than you expect by the way, and really affordable."
Lifestyle magazines themselves have been more circumspect about the change in British attitudes but have also been notably hard to find, with most of the editors claiming to be 'On holiday in South Lebanon, the new must-visit destination' when journalists attempted to track them down this week.
The one place allegedly benefitting from the change is Hoxton in London, which has seen a massive drop in the number of massive morons riding impractical bicycles in a dangerous manner. "Suddenly it's safe to cross the road," said Gemma Gosling, a shop owner whose life has been plagued by incompetent lifestyle cyclists for ten years. "Frankly I thought they'd be wiped out by the laws of evolution but it turns out economic mismanagement by both political parties works a lot faster."
But for Ms Gosling, who runs a lifestyle emporium called Berets and Berettas, the increase in safety was bound to be bittersweet. The bailiffs are due next week and she is considering selling up her flat in Dalston to move to Walthamstow.