Nick Clegg claims that voters angry about government spending cuts have pushed Daily Mail through his letterbox and sung the Eastenders theme at him in the street.
In an interview paid for in candy bars, the Deputy Prime Minister says he had to ‘swallow pretty hard’ when he realised what needed to be done to bring down the number of Darth Vader minions left behind by Labour.
Asked if he felt ‘bilious’ at making a deal with the Teletubbies, Mr Clegg replies: ‘Of course, of course, of course!’
In remarks likely to irritate Right-wing Conservatives, the Deputy Prime Minister claims that his party’s presence in government is shifting Tory ministers to the bathroom.
[please note, I actually don't mind Cleggy too much, I just felt like having fun this weekend, and am a little bit drunk.]