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[New thread started as previous 'Ticker Submissions' thread had moved on to a second page]
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'Mars Probe Finds "Nothing To see - Go Away" Scratched On Rock'
- Hat-tip to Wren in the Chat room
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'Formerly Locked-Down Public Advised To Lose Weight By Getting Haircut'
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More news:
'Pissed-Off Spanish Holidaymakers Demand That Virus Give More Notice Of Where & When It's Gong To Re-Surge'
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'Jewish Lawyers Will Make Fortune From Labour Anti-Semitism Allegation Cases Say Anti-Semitic Labour Members'
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Just Returned from Spain? Why Not Write for NewsBiscuit? After All, You Won't Be dong Anything Else For A While'
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'Man Avoids Quarantine After Explaining He Only Went To Spain To Test His Eyesight'
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'My Brother Went to Spain, But All I Got Was Two Weeks Of Freedom'
More news:
'Latest CV Case suggests Virus Spread By Victims Licking Their Own Arses'
- Hat-tip to Larry.
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'12-Yr-Old Accused Of Wasting Police Time: Told "Next Time, Use a Real Gun"'
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'Police Reprimanded For Not Saying "Please" When Asking Man To Put Down Machette'
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[Oooh look! I've got a star! Wets self with pride and delight. Thank you, Fairy!]
Like the Spain eyesight one.
And also have to commend you for embracing this new way of posting ticker submissions. Can't remember if I've already done that or not.
Thanks - I only post stuff on here to test my eys#hg%yt obvs.
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In other news:
'John Bercow Praised For Declining To Swell Lords' Numbers Yet Further'
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'Pendulum Of Public Popularity Swings Against TicTok'
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'Govt. Tries To Appoint Minister Of Piss-Ups In Breweries But Gets It Wrong'
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'Western Nations Thrown Into Confusion As Huawei Produces Anti-CV Vaccine'
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'Tightarse TV-Less 75-Yr-Old Delighted He's Now Still Saving £157.39 Each Year'
More news:
'Dam-Building Beavers Flood In To Exploit Relaxed Planning Rules'
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Now edited:
'"Beirut Explosion Caused By Detonation Of Explosive Material" Shock Revelation'
- And there was everyone thinking it was just a gust of wind, or someone farting.
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'Twitter Bans Trump For Copying NewsBiscuit Correspondent's Claim That Children Are Immune To CV'
Hahaha. Thought you'd stopped mentioning it because you'd finally worked it out as you'd had months. How delightful you still want to show off how clever you are by still not getting it...do you even remember which NB correspondent it was who implied kids were immune? Or does part of you remember very well and another part require the suppression of that inconvenient memory, hence your revisionism? Do you still believe that cobras might not be serpents?
Do you still believe that cobras might not be serpents?
I didn't believe (or disbelieve) anything - I had the courtesy and the humility to ask.
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do you even remember which NB correspondent it was who implied kids were immune?
Whoever it might have been, I imagine that they're now pleased that they have been proven right, by Donald Trump agreeing with them.
Do you still believe that cobras might not be serpents?
I didn't believe (or disbelieve) anything - I had the courtesy and the humility to ask.
Nope, you didn't have the courtesy or humility to ask anything; nor do you have the courtesy or humility to admit you expressed your belief that cobras might not be serpents, right?
Even though I'm not sure whether cobras actually are serpents.
http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=141509
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do you even remember which NB correspondent it was who implied kids were immune?
Whoever it might have been, I imagine that they're now pleased that they have been proven right, by Donald Trump agreeing with them.
Hahaha. Don't leave us in suspense...tell us, Titus, who is this NB correspondent you're mocking for claiming that children are immune to CV? It's not, perchance a figment of your imagination, is it?
As a general rule, if you want your tickers to be seen by the editors, I think the best way is to submit them individually like everyone else so that each one can stand on its merits and be marked accordingly.
Do you still believe that cobras might not be serpents?
I didn't believe (or disbelieve) anything - I had the courtesy and the humility to ask.
do you even remember which NB correspondent it was who implied kids were immune?
Whoever it might have been, I imagine that they're now pleased that they have been proven right, by Donald Trump agreeing with them.
Now your two comments above have been disproved, it'd highly amuse me if you would add further proof of your fragile ego by ignoring them, or, better still, affirm that you still stand by them. Thanks in advance!
As a general rule, if you want your tickers to be seen by the editors, I think the best way is to submit them individually like everyone else so that each one can stand on its merits and be marked accordingly.
Thank you, O Master. I hear and obey.
Note to the rest of you riffraff: don't blame me. I was simply obeying orders.
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