Ahead of tomorrow's Spending Review, sources close to Westminster have revealed that the Pantomime industry is to be one of the most heavily hit services, causing panic amongst amateur dramatic groups and C list celebrities alike.
'This is madness', remarked Snow White's Christopher Biggins, 'It's our busiest time of year. They're going to reduce the Dwarf allowance to 3 and we can't even afford that bloke who came fifth in Strictly two years ago.'
To make matters worse, the coalition government is to introduce 'mean testing' for all Pantomime villains. Pantomime stalwarts Captain Hook, and Cinderalla's wicked stepmother must provide a portfolio of their evil-doings to Culture secretary Jeremy Hunt before the end of the month, otherwise they too could face the axe.
Human Rights groups are preparing a legal challenge to the plans for mandatory gender testing for all pantomime dames.
Labour have blasted the plans as 'cruel beyond belief' depriving the vertically challenged with a seasonal income. With several evil characters facing redundancy Peter Mandelson has agreed to step in where necessary.
Darren Day, Michelle Gayle,and some other woman who was on telly years ago, but we can't remember her name are releasing a charity single to help raise awareness and funds.