Quick links: NewsBiscuit Home • Chat Room • Writers' Room • Top Ten
We have had a moratorium on new members whilst we stopped the various spammers trying to corner the market in satirical sub-continent house moves.
Now we are finally out of the EU and Brexit is completely finished, we have been able to open up the registration process again.
To avoid us chasing new talent away, can we be welcoming in the writers' room and give advice, stars and whatever else is required to encourage our new members to stay and join the fight in the war against Titus.
Could we have the names please? That way we can ensure we're not accidentally nice to somebody we don't have to be.
Could we ask new members (and some old codgers who will remain nameless) to take time to add a profile pic instead of using the standard coloured origami snowflakes? For example VCG's stands out well as does Flash 'Arry's. It might also stop those pesky spammers from posting shite if they have to make an effort.
Could we have the names please?
The recent ones to join are:
lucys
brainstorm
Eric Kliszcz
AdamYoung
oshaughnessy
nicharper
JoBo
All except JoBo received their IDs in the last 24 hours so there may be some time before they are brave enough to post !
Welcome to them all anyway !!
Welcome everybody. If you're looking for some pointers have a read of some of the posts from Titus. Then don't do it like that.
Welcome newbies. If you look around you'll find some sage advice on submissions in the writer's room in the links at the top - most ignore them to some degree, but the more successful contributors (if success is your thing) kind of follow them most of the time. There's probably a correlation, but buggered if I can work it out.
Look at what seems to be working - that is, what the editors are currently posting on the front page, and compare to your subs. If your subs aren't getting picked, don't be disheartened, the vast majority of the subs in the writer's room don't get promoted to the front page, many I suspect were never meant to. Or you might be modelling on Titus' subs, in which case...
Try, modify and try again would be my advice.
The bit nobody tells anyone when they arrive is how to submit a ticker, because it looks like everyone is allowed to submit a heading and no body, but when you try it won't let you. Just put a full stop in the body and it will all work.
If you have a thick skin, hang on to it, if you haven't, then maybe the NB shop will sell you one. In time you will develop one anyway, any writer does.
Another pitfall is the 6 hour editing window. You have a window of 6 hours in which to edit. Edit within 6 hours of starting a thread or comment. After that, just add the revised version at the end of the thread. 6 hours, got it?
And, the guidelines are not rules. They are guidelines. ANY format might work on ANY topic - there has been some hilarious strangely formatted stuff here, but the standard format has a better chance of being published
Also, obviously, don't offend too many people all in one go
How many accounts can new members have?
There is a strict vetting process in place which involves me having a look at their details and deciding whether to let it go through or not.
In your case, where you have currently 467 aliases, I think its reasonable to assume any requests with that domain are not likely to be allowed.
I believe you create a GRAVATAR though this site and tie it in with the email address you use for Newsbiscuit.
Here are the NB instructions provided by our Nice Admin Lady.
http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=69715#post-204842
Good Luck!
A couple more today:
Squorrox
LG93
Welcome all and may I present my newsbiscuit glossary - the hard earned knowledge of insider lingo that I've gleaned over the years:
Sub Submission I.e. something you post in the writers room with the intention of it being used on the site.
FP front page and NIB news in brief are easy. tickers are the one liners at the top of the page. Left Alert is what the 'Featured' section on the front of the site gets called. It's for stories more in the style of a... feature - instead of a news report. That means it can be slightly less topical, which suits my thinking pace.
WoM is writer of the month, a title awarded based on calculations of productivity performed by Throngsman (already on this thread) entirely for free. Although he will accept bribes to bump you up a few places, I've never had enough to offer to even make the top three.
Finally for now there are various legends of the site. Back up your brain has been mentioned. Genuine Welsh Bees was another piece of (this time intentional) unpublishable brilliance that parodied the spam that TechGuy does daily battle with.
Well there you have it. if that's all I've learned in all these years wtf have I been doing?
FOT is Fuck off, Titus. It saves time.
Not sure if Dr. Katz is still practising. Shame, because she could surely help remotely for the requisite fee.
You must log in to post.
