In an unprecedented attempt to be granted early release from prison following 20 life sentences for the murder of 13 women, Peter Sutcliffe AKA 'The Yorkshire Kipper' is believed to have applied for a complete change of species from Homosapien to Hexapoda.
Sutcliffe, currently known as Peter Cocoonon has told staff at Broadmoor that he no longer wishes to be referred to as a human being (sic) but as Peter the Pterygota Mayfly.
But Entomologists have warned that if Sutcliffe is allowed to change species in this manner he would have already served 7,457,087 life sentences and would not only be eligible for parole but due £4,956,000 for carrying out prison duties.
Justice Secretary Jack Straw (more sic) said 'under no circumstances would we release 'The Kipper'
Sutcliffe is believed to be in touch with Hollywood movie star Jeff Goldblum who made a similar successful transition back in 1986 and has been constantly getting away with murder ever since.
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No release for Yorkshire Kipper
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Posted 3 years ago #
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