When plumber Colin Whizz-Furze, suped up a mobility scooter, originally designed for a disabled friend, he had no idea that it would attract some very dangerous customers, who descended on Colin, to have their mobility scooters, suped up.
Hells Grannies, who are the geriatric arm of the Hells Angels, heard about Colin's 69mph mobility scooter, and tracked him down.
Colin not wanting to get on the wrong side, of these dangerous old women, has now suped up all of their mobility scooters.
But the consequences of Colin's actions, are now being felt hard, in the sleepy town of Stamford in Lincolnshire, where 5,000 Hells Grannies have been terrorizing the community at high speed.
20 policemen were mowed down by the Hells Grannies, as they tried to stop them speeding along the pavement, into their local Ethel Austins Clothing store, where they were going to buy their Lyle stockings.
30 traffic wardens, were mowed down in car parks, in the area around the town of Stamford, as the Hells Grannies sped in and out of the disabled parking spaces, close to the town centre's shops.
60 police cones and Zebras on Crossings were also hurt in the incident.
The Hells Grannies, keen on speed, water pistoled at close range, anyone who dared to get in their way, or to try and stop them in their tracks.
Clad in motorbiking leathers, and open faced black helmets, bearing the Hells Grannies logo, which is a skull and cross bones and bearing the words:
"Hells Grannies - One Foot in a Wooden Overcoat",
printed on them, not to mention knee high leather boots, and dark shades, the Hells Grannies caused mayhem throughout the country today, many have had their mobility scooters customized, with elaborate Hells Grannies paint jobs, bearing their exclusive logo.
50 police cars crashed, trying to catch up with the Hells Grannies, many zipping through traffic at 69mph, in a zig zag fashion, with their 'anyway up' couldn't care less attitude, to say the least, it was a challenge, well set ,that they would ever be apprehended.
Meanwhile Colin Whizz-Furze, has been inundated with orders for more of these mean machines, but is in a dilemma, since the department of transport ,being the typical spoil sports, have banned him from making anymore.
Margaret Ambler, the mother of professional protestor Peter Caravan-Ambler, is now busy leading a Hells Grannies protest assisted by son Peter, to campaign to have the department of transport ruling lifted off Colin.
Margaret Ambler a proud owner, of one of Colin's suped up mobility scooters, lead 500 Hells Grannies in a whiz around the department of transport building in Swansea, where between them they managed to mow down 30 members of the department of transport staff, as they came out of work, speeding off before the police could catch them, through the country roads on the outskirts of the area.
20 other members of the department of transport staff, were poked up their backsides, with walking sticks, which the Hells Grannies were carrying on board, their suped up mobility scooters.
A further 40 department of transport staff, were water pistoled at close range, by speeding Hells Grannies on the suped up scooters, whilst some had their hats knocked off, as other Hells Grannies sped past them, and knocked off their hats with rolled up parasols....black of course.
A Department of Transport spokesman, Mr Harry Driver, said that his staff were terrified, by these geriatric juvenile delinquents, as they were quite clearly, well out of control.
Peter Caravan Ambler and fellow professional protestor Dorothy Atkins-Sky, are thought to be hiding the Hells Grannies in specially made bunker hide outs, in the countryside on the outskirts of the Stamford area.
Police have issued a warning to the public, that they must not try and make citizens arrests, of these dangerous geriatric Hells Grannies, and to stay indoors until they are all tracked down.
It remains to be seen what the legal system, will do with the Hells Grannies, once they are caught, as most of them are over 80 year of age, and by the time they get them into court, many of them might already be in wooden overcoats.
Margaret Ambler is 92 years of age.
More news later, watch this space, plus suped up mobility scooters.
This news story is dedicated to my late mother, Margaret Ambler who was a suped up mobility scooter fan and one of the infamous Hells Grannies dedicated to speed as am I!