As part of the government's comprehensive spending review, the chancellor George Osborne is expected to announce later this week, that from April 2011, all unemployment will be outsourced to India and Malaysia.
"The soaring cost of unemployment is unsustainable." Said Mr Osborne. "We have to be brave and design radical solutions to these problems. Having all the unemployed shipped out to the Far East where the cost of living is much lower, makes good financial sense."
In a recent statement, David Cameron said that the issue of the poverty trap could be resolved. It is understood that a large container shipment of poverty traps has recently been imported from China. These are to be placed around the less affluent areas of the country, baited with free cigarettes and lottery scratch cards.