Josh Lewin and Samantha Froggatt, both aged 19, have finally hung up the telephone after taking three years to finish their conversation.
The pair began talking on March 13 2007, when their relationship was just two weeks old. Now, after three and half years years and approximately 74,000 different iterations of the phrase ‘no, you hang up first’, Josh has finally caved and admitted that his passionate ardour is not, in the final analysis, greater than hers.
The romantic but tedious conversation lasted longer than Gordon Brown’s premiership, and has seen three X-factor contestants blossom and fade from memory. It survived a hairy moment in 2008 when Sam’s phone began running out of power, but a lightening quick change of battery, whilst the pair continued the conversation mobile-to-mobile, ensured that, within the terms of the contest as defined by the couple, she hadn’t actually gone first.
Friends of the pair have long forgotten who they actually are, as have their own parents. “At first I used to shout at Josh that he was going to be late for his exams and stuff”, said his mum, yesterday. “But when he stopped even bothering to give me that pouty stare thing, I just backed off completely. Have they actually finished yet?”
Samantha is upbeat about her career prospects, in spite of having missed all the deadlines for college applications year after year. “No, really, I think three and a half years having a really long and meaningless conversation is, like, really good preparation for a job in a BT call-centre”, she said yesterday.
Josh and Samantha are no longer together.