Mid month point and technically Wren is leading. But technically he isn't because of that darned Wren rule! Tonymc81 is the guy to watch out for, with Dom not far behind. Links to all the subs on the blog, as usual.
Quick links: NewsBiscuit Home • Chat Room • Writers' Room • Top Ten
WOTM Aug 2019
(19 posts) (14 voices)
-
Thanks throngsman! I'm chuffed to have some points. I thought I'd stopped being funny in 2017.
Are we supposed to welcome you back with open arms and reply to that by saying that you’ve always been funny? After you swanned off, probably into the arms of others for all we know, for all that time? There’s words for girls like you, carrying on behind our backs, copping off with other suitors at the slightest opportunity. I think we should go round there and smash their faces in. And as for you, you’ve got a lot of being funny to catch up on if you are to be accepted around here again.
(Welcome back with open arms really)
Posted 6 months ago # -
Techically Wren wins again, but also technically Wren falls foul of the Wren rule. So our new champ is Tonymc81 who has had a storming month. All the FP, NiB, and LA links on the blog, ticker list below.
Ticker Archive
4crosses
Bury-ied. More later.
Adria Bamforth
Man enters Mosque looking for bouncy castle after shoes found outside
Peru avoids disaster after Amazon fires delivered next door. More later.Al Opecia
Johnson replaces Democracy with Demagoguery. Much more soon.
Man dies content as he uses last strip in box of staples.Bonjonelson
Trump promises to Make Greenland Green Again
Chipchase
Old hippies freak out as Frank Zappa spotted flying over Channel on tea tray
Deskpilot3
MPs bemoan loss of Parliamentary time. All three years of it. More later.
Dominic_mcg
Cuadrilla furious that they’ve chosen to dig in an earthquake zone. More later.
Damn dodgy bloke visits dodgy broke dam. More soon.
Denmark agrees to sell Greenland to China. More soon.
Homophobic MP claims he never had a man date. More soon.
Hong Kong airport authorities refuse to comment on flight or fight scenario. More later
Horse fetishists in stable relationship. More soon
James Cleverly is an oxymoron. More soon.
Johnson hires Phoebe Waller-Bridge to rewrite Brexit negotiation. More soon.
Johnson refuses to comment on compulsory pineapple on pizzas after Brexit. More soon.
Lionel Richie finally gets around to re-painting the ceiling. More soon.
Provisional IRA finally get its full licence. More soon.
Smart investors buying Danbury Mint Plates after sterling drops to a new low.
Zoe Ball’s 780,000 lost listeners were all repatriated asylum seekers.Gerontius
Election update : ‘Tomorrow belongs to me’ insists Boris. More later.
Queen: ‘Thanks for getting Andrew off the front pages’. More later.
Tories to spend billions on problems caused by austerity measures.Guido Drapatolli
Nostradamus gives up. More later.
Katewritesstuff
Global warming experts panic amid HRT shortage. More soon.
Max Stars
Boris goes prorogue. More later.
Mick Turate
Evacuated Whaley Bridge residents blame Pinewood Studios Dambusters remake
Storm Dorian. Floridians urged to put pictures of small storms in their attics. More later.Newsbiscuit
48% of the public think ‘prorogation’ is a concept album. More later.
Newsdesk
Cuadrilla splits England in half: Manchester ship canal now extends to Grimsby. More later.
Holidaymaker sues RSPB for lost chips. More soon.
Hosepipe ban imposed on Whaley Bridge residents. More soon.Notnowcato
Man who bought allotment in centre of maze admits he’s lost the plot. More soon.
ron cawleyoni
Amazon fire kindles no love for Bolsonaro
Elton defends..”Harry Harry and The Jets..Jets..Jets”
Jacob Rees-Mogg replaces commemorative 50P coins with ten shilling note
Nero Fiddled. Bolsonaro Laughs. More later (if there is a later).
Public opinion still split on fracking? More later.
Reading & Leeds 2019: Festival-goers should pay tent tax, inclusive of Pole Tax. More later.
Trump: ‘Boris the right man to deliver Brexit…for us’. More later.
What’s the story Balmorally? More later.Sir Lupus
“Lets talk about the new football season” say England cricket fans
Skylarking
‘You can prorogue mahone’ Parliament tells Boris. More later.
Smart Alex
Exclusive Bangkok restaurant tells man he can’t come in without a Thai. More soon.
Thanet District Council offers Trump cut-price deal on Dreamland
Trump insists hurricanes could be stopped by a good guy with a gun. More later.
Trump wants to buy Iceland from Kerry Katona. More soon.Sydalg
Boozers, sots, tipplers, dipsomaniacs unite to form Alcoholics Synonymous
Man who had treatment for Tourette’s swears he’s cured
Notre Dame to be rebuilt as roller coaster. More later
Rural lovers’ spot dogged by controversyTitus
Advocates Of Tighter US Gun Control ‘Gradually Being Eliminated’
But will there be border checks at the entrance to this ‘special’ place in Hell? More later.
Church Attendances Slide
City’s air pollution problems solved as it disappears under water. More later.
New Pollypill Reduces Heart Attacks In Parrots
Office for National Statistics Doesn’t Know whether it’s coming or going, or if anyone else is.
Optimists live longer than us grumpy old gits? Bollo – urrg … [THUD]. Less later.
Pilots’ strike wasted as BA shoots itself in foot by cancelling wrong flights. More later.
Stuff Brexit: Parliament recalled in national emergency as Footie Clubs go bust. More later.Tonymc81
10 Fighter Jets accompanying Royals budget flight normal service say FlyBe
Farm Thefts at all time high as 3 Meadows and a wheat field go missing. More soon.
Fracking Company baffled as to why earthquakes keep happening. More later
Hansard to file PM’s speeches under fiction in House of Commons library
I will do what Hitler couldn’t do and shut down parliament boasts Boris. More late.
No Deal Johnson calls Tusk, Mr Stinky Pants, as high level negotiations continue. More later
Palace secretly cancels Andrew’s subscription to Teen Vogue and Teen Girls mags. More later.
Queen offers Andrew’s accuser weekend break in Paris. More later.
RAF drop bags of Boris’s used underpants to shore up Dam
Southend Beach: Couple steal a bag of stones, 6 Dogs turds and 3 used condoms
Sports Direct slam Glasgow University for agreeing to pay back slavery profits. More later.Walter Eagle
Bury FC go first six games of season without conceding a goal
Wrenfoe
Prorogation plan abandoned as no-one knows how to pronounce it. More later.
Wrenfoe
White supremacist killer accused of plagiarism
Posted 5 months ago # -
*grumbles* Stupid Wren-rule
Face... is this face bovvahd? Well Is it? Suck it up. :-)
Well done Tony great month and really loved the M. Francois one in particular.
Well done all contributors and of course, in particular the Throngster, for catching everything in his Net of Writeryness.
Posted 5 months ago # -
Congrats tony and wren - Mug ceremoniously prorogued and the queen popped in to reopen it on Tony's head.
Posted 5 months ago #
Reply
You must log in to post.